Holiday Stressing You Out?

Holiday Stressing You Out?
Holiday Stressing You Out?

Stress and depression are very common during the holidays with an enormous demand on our time, money, and emotion. Whether it’s a work party you have to attend, an unexpected gift you have to buy, or friends and family that expect you to host them in a clean and beautifully decorated house, the Season of Giving can sure take a lot out of you! Here are some helpful ideas to keep your sanity, and your health, during this wonderful time…

First, let yourself feel all those emotions! It’s ok to stop, go in another room, close your eyes and either cry or scream.

In fact, letting the emotion out is much better for your psyche and your body. When you bottle it up, or hold it in, you are actually causing your body to go into a sort of “fight or flight” reaction, which does lots of damage to your body and your mind. It’s ok to let the kids, or family and guests, out of your sight for 10 minutes (as long as they are safe), for you to go into another room, shut out the world with your favorite music, and get your thoughts back to a good place. A few minutes of meditation, deep breathing, and release of emotion can put that smile back on your face. If fact, I’d say that that is best for the kids or guests too. If you don’t take care of yourself first, you can’t take care of anyone else.

Second, be realistic! No one is perfect. Not your kids, not your guests, not your partner, and not YOU! I’m sure not, and acknowledging that has helped me lower my expectations of the holidays. They won’t be perfect either – and THAT is perfect! There will be beautiful moments. There will be love. There will be laughter. Cherish those wonderful moments, and let all the rest go. The spirit of the season is about sharing time with those who we hold dear, not about how clean the house is, or how many different kinds of cookies there are (my husband disagrees on this point), or how many presents are given. When everyone is gone, I want my friends and family to have memories of my love and laughter – not the sweater I bought. The sweater will, hopefully, be a reminder of the great TIME we had together, not how much I spent on it.

Third, plan and then try to stick to the plan! This is especially true for finances. You should set a budget for each person for whom you must purchase a gift and stick to it. Do NOT be lured into all the marketing myths that the holidays are about how many and how much. Happiness does not come from a giant pile of presents, nor from all those bills after the holidays because of overspending. Happiness, again, is being together. Way back in 7th grade I wrote a poem for a class using question words (and it ended up in the school year book) that explains this very well:

It doesn’t matter what you have,

It doesn’t matter where you go,

All that matters is who you have beside you!

But you should also plan your time. If some friend or family member springs a party on you at the last minute, and you do not have time to go, it’s OK to say no. You can say that you simply do not have time, but you’d be happy to get together at a later date. If someone wants you to take your time that you don’t have to give, think of time as money, and that will help you say no more easily.

Finally, don’t forget about your health. It’s a great time of year for incredible indulgence on good food, good wine, and of course, those cookies! Just remember that every calorie you consume must be burned back off with physical activity or you will gain weight. If you are also skiing, running a race, cleaning your house like a crazy-person, or otherwise continuing to exercise, it’s ok to indulge. Just remember that “every calorie” rule. The more our bodies weigh above our own personal idea, the more health problems we have. Staying at a healthy weight, for your own body (never compare yourself with anyone else), is tough this time of year, but think of the new year when we all feel like we have to make the same resolution I make every year – lose weight!

So, be good to yourself this year. Work hard to keep the spirit of love alive in your heart and that will help you stay healthy. Health is not about money spent, or a clean house, or being exhausted. Health is about knowing your limits, and not straying outside those limits because some crazy TV commercial says you should.

Be well, Be Wise.

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Wise Words…. is a weekly general medical information column from Dr Rebecca Wise. Dr. Wise has a master’s degree in education as well as her doctorate in pharmacy. She is an assistant professor and ambulatory care specialist at a Medication Therapy Management (MTM) clinic in Erie, PA.

Soon to be released is Dr Becky’s new website which will address women’s issues, watch for it: www.WiseWordsforWomen.com
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